Since Jane's arrival in late November, in many ways, I have never felt more personally fulfilled. However, I couldn't help but feel that I struggled daily to keep everything together. My closet was a total disaster. Why? Probably because I have yet to really commit to a post-baby diet leaving me to find an outfit or two I can squeeze into and everything else on the floor. I had stopped cooking meals from scratch, and I found every excuse not to exercise. I felt like I had just given up and had lost control of my health, and honestly, myself.
Until this week, that is... I decided to completely clean up my closet. It sounds like a small step, but it was the first step into getting back on the right track. I started counting my points again, and I will weigh in next Wednesday. Most importantly, I took my first pilates reformer class in more than two years. It was AMAZING!!!!
I first took pilates in Beaufort with one of my best friends and the world's best trainer. It was one hour every other day that I looked forward to from the moment I woke up. This year for Christmas, my parents got me a gift card to Romney Pilates, and I couldn't think of anything better to reset my mind and my body.
Tonight, I went back for my second session at Romney, and I think, no, I know, that this is what I was missing. I needed to find an outlet that allowed me to close my eyes and focus on me. I know that sounds ridiculously selfish, but I think I have tried to focus on everything but me assuming that's what good parents do. But, somewhere in there, I lost myself. And in two brief, but very important, hours, I found my center. And I found my motivation to get back to normal. And it feels really, really good.
You can do it! Don't be too hard on yourself though. I adore WW program and lost my baby weight (twice) with them. Good Luck!
ReplyDeleteFinding your center and realizing how important it is to take care of you is one of the greatest overlooked aspects of motherhood. It took me 8 months into my 2nd child's life to get over the "guilt" I felt when I did something for myself that did not revolve around my child. Some how, thru the bliss of becoming a mom (although we all know it is not ALL bliss!), I forgot about taking care of me. It was very hard to reason with myself that I too was just as important as my children. Going to the gym and leaving them in daycare wasn't a sign that I wasn't a good mom, it was a sign that I understand that taking care of myself was just as important as taking care of them. And in doing so, I really came to understand that a happy mom is a good mom. Kudos to you Jennifer for realizing this in 6 short months! And good luck on your journey to finding your balance!
ReplyDeleteI really love the honesty of your blog. It is so one of my favorites. You will find a balance in due time...just follow your heart.
ReplyDeleteGreat post Jen and I think a lot of us moms have been there before. I know I felt so guilty for leaving Elle at home as I went off to zumba when she was first born or simply had to leave the house and go explore target ALONE!!! But, I had to remind myself that by taking care of myself is what will make me a better mom. Do not at all feel guilty as you embark on this journey.
ReplyDeletePS: You should share some of your WW recipes posts here and there.